Quality Time, suckas

Mike = My Brother
Erin = Me
Taylor = My sister

Mike: I can just see the ad campaign for "Bawls" now... like a dad walks into your room, and says 'Son, are you playing with you Bawls?'"
Erin: Yeah, and then the bottle has like, a little skirt on it. Like he's playing.
Taylor: A skirt?!
Erin: Well, yeah.
M: Another questionable bottle design. Why the bumps?
E: Oh, I know.
M: But it's nothing compared to those Umberto Giannini hair products that look like huge dildos.
E: Really? *click click google*
**The aforementioned hair product does indeed look like a dirty pleasure toy**
E: Oh, wow.
M: Yeah, they look like little vibrators, but they're like, huge! Like this big *Puts a three-foot gap between hands to show height*
E: Well, good!
M: ....
T: ....
E: ....
M: ... that was the best possible answer to that.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

People's Choice Awards

America, what is wrong with you?

Your favorite three movies, from an ENTIRE YEAR, and the only ones you can boil it down to are Batman Begins, Hitch, and Star Wars III!?

Maybe I don't want to know what the people's choice was for anything. I never asked for any of this. I never ever asked or wanted to know if anyone saw Hitch, or if Green Day is the best band all year. No.

ErinZ (10:45:30 AM): the people's choice awards are clearly for retards only.
Brando (10:45:37 AM): (laughs)
ErinZ (10:45:48 AM): i think that must have been a requirement. to vote, you need to be deemed mentally unfit by the state.
Brando (10:45:53 AM): The Retarded People's Choice Awards?

* * *

Brando (10:49:00 AM): Who *won*?
ErinZ (10:49:04 AM): Star Wars.
Brando (10:49:09 AM): PFFT.
Brando (10:51:07 AM): Dat one wins a'cause it had da' most commercials.
Brando (10:51:34 AM): Dey were ons my Dorito's bag and everyt'ing.

Way to go, democracy.

Angel Brody

.. Touché, Tim. But actually, I really wasn't talking about covering up what I want to say, just talking about what talking could be like in general. I was really bored and kind of perturbed that night. You understand.

I just had some absolutely vivid and bizarre dreams.

One of which was Adrien Brody, WITH ANGEL WINGS. Although the angel wings were like parrot wings, but he really was an angel, from heaven and the whole shebang. He was in love with me, HOWEVER, he said although he would really LOVE to do me, he wasn't sure if it was cool with God. Because, you know, he's an angel and everything.

The other dream involved me going on some weirdo version of the Haunted Mansion Holiday, but all the animatronics (and also these stuffed animals I was clutching) were real. I was with my sister, trying to convince her of that, and she just laughed at me and called me stupid. I said, "No, there ARE real, they're alive and everything" and she still laughed. I then tried to leap over a giant pumpkin, but my sister grabbed onto my legs and it was really, really painful. I tried to punch her off me but I passed out from pain. When I woke up we were surrounded by all the living characters from Nightmare Before Christmas, including characters from Hocus Pocus, all concerned for my health. My sister apologized and the characters were all reciting lyrics from "Kidnap the Sandy Claws" and I thought to myself, "Santa Claus would shit if he saw all this"

Wouldn't it be interesting if we all just said exactly what was on our minds when it came to interacting with others? Exactly what you're thinking. No bullshit. Just let it all out. And, for convesation's sake, let's pretend that in everyday society, that's how people function. By saying shit that needs to be said.

I guess covering the truth or just flat-out making shit up is just how we work. Everyone is afraid of hurting everyone else, and on top of that everyone is afraid of making an idiot out of themselves. I suppose it all just gets to a certain point where, when almost everyone you know has been bullshitting about everything right to your face and you know it and it has been going on for months, you just get sick, tired, and pissed off. Or just frustrated.

Someone get me out of my house, I'm thinking too much.

Snickers are only good if you eat them.

I can't help but wonder...

... is it fate that my Gmail ticker is displaying a "Theme Park Engineering Class" website?

I mean, because it's not like I cry out of sheer inspiration when I listen to my $100 6-disc "A Musical History of Disneyland" CD set or anything.

Well, thank God!

Your Elf Name Is...

Pixie Fluffernutter

What's Your Elf Name?

Kronk's New Groove

... was not very good. It wasn't necessarily bad, but... mediocre. However, it did have ONE thing that made it well worth my twenty dollars, and that happens to be one of the only things that can redeem a so-so animated feature (this one thing also happens to be one of my favorite things that can be done in an animated feature as well), and that is...

A DANCE AND MONTAGE SCENE SET TO DISCO MUSIC.

Plus Ms. Birdwell is simply adorable and I love her. So there.

The Choices Are Yours and Yours Alone

Hey bitches, guess who's back. I was going to start updating once the site/blog revamp was up, but screw it because I have things to say. Write.

I'm all Konged out now that I've seen the King twice in the same twenty-four hour period. The first time didn't count because the only seats that were available to my party were cleverly positioned three feet away from the screen. Incidentally, this placement caused me to have a horrendous bout of motion sickness lasting for the final two hours of the film. So I just kind of closed my eyes and listened to dinosaurs and giant bugs eat absolutely everything. The second time around I sat ALL THE WAY in the back. Boy, is that bug scene creepy or what?

So what has Erin been up to since the last time she updated? I'm sure you're all asking yourselves that. The answer to that would be:

• A successful dropping of art school
• A successful shattering of my heart by someone who didn't mean to at all
• A successful picking u and glue-ing back together of those pieces by a very nice (and persistent) boy
• A successful realization that I was born to do character design
• A successful freelance job in which I discovered that I doubt my abilities as an artist a little too much, sometimes
• An unsuccessful attempt at a job at Nickelodeon (I'll get those bastards yet)
• A lot of waitressing
• A lot of daydreaming
• A lot of driving to LA
• A lot of Disneyland (and I mean a lot)
• Keeping Corner Bakery afloat double-handedly (Beckie's the other hand)
• Seeing Coldplay (I can now die)
• Seeing Backstreet Boys
• Seeing Beck AGAIN

I'll let you know if I left anything out. That's all for now.

Space Mountain Count: 82

Nothing that I wouldn't try

Comic-con = too much to even describe when it comes to awesomeness and fun. I got mooninite socks.

Working working working.

Also, if you ever have a chane to see Beck live... do it.

Erin's Movie Update

What's today? Thursday, Friday?

Several things have become apparent to me recently. First and foremost:

Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory is probably the best movie ever made. Honestly. The writing is so good that it blows my mind and I wonder why movies just don't have the same ridiculous spark of pure entertainment that this movie has. Every character is loveable in their own quirky way, even Augustus Gloop, who literally spends thirty seconds on the screen and has three lines before being sucked up in a giant tube stuck in a chocolate river. But that's because it's impossible not to at least have the slight urge to poke a fat German's boy's stomach and giggle. Just think about it. If Gene Wilder ever asks me to marry him I will say yes instantly.

Which brings me to my next point:

As everyone in the world knows, Tim Burton is releasing his own version of a semi-dark yet vividly colored Chocolate Factory. Naturally it has a modern twist to it (just look at Violet's jogging suit and everyone's sneakers) but I will be absolutely astonished if Burton's rendition even so much as touches the hilarious innocence and splendor of one of the most convincing worlds made in a film. Tim Burton's great and all, but I just can't imagine the new film coming close to the original. But it should be interesting, at least. Although the guy who is playing Grandpa Joe is so creepy that I'm starting to lose sleep at night. He looks like Pixar's Geri and Woody Allen had a sickly old baby. I just can't imagine that guy being as squeezeable as the original GJ.

Point number trois:

I have NO idea why (and I probably never will) but I just watched this and I can't wait to see it. If someone walked up to you on the street and pitched a movie starring Jack Black in a SERIOUS role followed by the description of a barrage of battles between dinosaurs and a giant gorilla while a skinny scantily clad blond woman is thrown into the mix, you'd probably slap that person in the face and spit on his shoe for insulting your intelligence (unless you're one of those people who liked Constantine ((and I'm very sorry to he people who are my good friends who enjoyed Constantine and will probably buy it on DVD next week))) Yet the intrigue and desire to see this movie is prominenty coursing through my veins.

Sleeping Beauty is the worst movie Disney ever made, yet has the best style of any of their animated films (actually, the second best, Emperor's New Groove still is the top in my book). Maleficent could have been the craziest (and sexist) baddie ever and her introduction scene makes me shiver and drool at how lithe and calculating she is, but then the next time you see her she's hanging out on a forbidden mountain with henchmen who are a combination of vultures, bats and pigs. What the hell is that? And sadly, even though Princess Aurora is probably the hottest Disney princess ever, she is also the most boring and is hardly even in the movie at all.

Howl's Moving Castle is brilliant.

I think I'm out of things to say for now.

Remember to tip your waitress.

Guess Who's Back...

At the Speed of Sound

New Coldplay Album = Fluids in my pants.

Click the titles for pictures!! Do it now! Right here!

Ain't that nifty?

The King and I

It never fails:

Every time I really enjoy a movie or television show and get all geared up to buy merchandise, I always... ALWAYS... end up loving the one character that tested the lowest with child audiences. Thusly, no merchandise.

My latest victim:

King Julien from the outrageously hilarious Madagascar. (The lemur with the big grin and the leafy hat) He's fuzzy, he's quirky, he's voiced by Ali G, and he can dance. Why does God deny me plush toy?

P.S. Now I work as a waitress at Chili's.

My good friend Brandon (too lazy to link) has thing thing in his journal where he instructs to put your playlist on shuffle and pick out the first twenty songs and add "in your pants". Let's see:

Pool Party in my pants
Hotel California in my pants
Robot Theme Song in my pants
Too Much Time On My Hands in my pants
Escaping Nomanisan in my pants
Renegade in my pants
Show Me The Way in my pants
Man Research in my pants
Confused and Upset in my pants
On The Open Road in my pants
Picture Book in my pants
The Lil' Bonus Room in my pants
Valleygirl in my pants
Parklife in my pants
Feel Good Inc. in my pants
Psychedelic Boogy Child in my pants
Addicted to Love In my pants
Coffee and Other Just Desserts in my pants
"I Promised Them Women" in my pants
Conquistador in my pants

Thank god Conquistador was the last one. That made me laugh.

scaredgirl.jpg 576x625 pixels

There is something to look at. Also forgot to say that Gorillaz has a new video and I'm too lazy to link to it, so I'll just link you to my art instead and you can go find the new video on your own. It makes me squeal. The song is eerily catchy, too. GO.

All I've been able to do is sit here, starve, catch up on scanning artwork and ignore a ten-page Critical Reasoning paper that is due in forty-eight hours. I'm eating loads of this Trader Joe's chocolate that comes in blocks as large as my torso. I don't like chocolate that much, and for someone who doesn't like chocolate, this chocolate is just about the damndest most delicious chocolate I've ever eaten in my life. I can't stop. Maybe it's because all I had to eat today was a half of a chicken breast and a bowl of cereal.

This chocolate is really good.

Sin City was seriously the most gruesome film I have ever seen ever.

Today I watched the Camelot song-and-dance scene from Holy Grail about ten times straight, and although I have seen it maybe a thousand times in my life thus far, today it was funnier than it was the first time I saw the movie. I'm not sure why that is, but it can probably be attributed from the massive amounts of genius oozing out of every gaping pore of the film.

Daylight savings time is the devil bringing darkness (or lightness in this case) to this world. I just love losing an hour of time for no particular reason. The whole day felt rushed.

I think I've finally figured out how to make some of my art look good for a change. We'll see how that goes.

I have a long week ahead of me.

My cell phone broke and now I'm using one from about five years ago that loses battery power even though it's not being used, and the version of "Snake" on it is so old that it's the version of the game in which you cannot pass through the walls.

I don't expect you to make sense of anything in that last paragraph.

This chocolate really is the cricket's wicket.

But I'm still incredibly hungry.

Grr.

Publick Nuisance

VENTURE BROTHERS SEASON TWO IS A GO.

I've never been so happy.