Thursday, January 19, 2006

Morning Schedule

Some of Cartoon Network's children's programming during the day:

• Little Robots
• Krypto the Superdog
• Harry and his Bucket Full of Dinosaurs

Does anyone else see how awesome this is?

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Quality Time, suckas

Mike = My Brother
Erin = Me
Taylor = My sister

Mike: I can just see the ad campaign for "Bawls" now... like a dad walks into your room, and says 'Son, are you playing with you Bawls?'"
Erin: Yeah, and then the bottle has like, a little skirt on it. Like he's playing.
Taylor: A skirt?!
Erin: Well, yeah.
M: Another questionable bottle design. Why the bumps?
E: Oh, I know.
M: But it's nothing compared to those Umberto Giannini hair products that look like huge dildos.
E: Really? *click click google*
**The aforementioned hair product does indeed look like a dirty pleasure toy**
E: Oh, wow.
M: Yeah, they look like little vibrators, but they're like, huge! Like this big *Puts a three-foot gap between hands to show height*
E: Well, good!
M: ....
T: ....
E: ....
M: ... that was the best possible answer to that.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

People's Choice Awards

America, what is wrong with you?

Your favorite three movies, from an ENTIRE YEAR, and the only ones you can boil it down to are Batman Begins, Hitch, and Star Wars III!?

Maybe I don't want to know what the people's choice was for anything. I never asked for any of this. I never ever asked or wanted to know if anyone saw Hitch, or if Green Day is the best band all year. No.

ErinZ (10:45:30 AM): the people's choice awards are clearly for retards only.
Brando (10:45:37 AM): (laughs)
ErinZ (10:45:48 AM): i think that must have been a requirement. to vote, you need to be deemed mentally unfit by the state.
Brando (10:45:53 AM): The Retarded People's Choice Awards?

* * *

Brando (10:49:00 AM): Who *won*?
ErinZ (10:49:04 AM): Star Wars.
Brando (10:49:09 AM): PFFT.
Brando (10:51:07 AM): Dat one wins a'cause it had da' most commercials.
Brando (10:51:34 AM): Dey were ons my Dorito's bag and everyt'ing.

Way to go, democracy.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Angel Brody

.. Touché, Tim. But actually, I really wasn't talking about covering up what I want to say, just talking about what talking could be like in general. I was really bored and kind of perturbed that night. You understand.

I just had some absolutely vivid and bizarre dreams.

One of which was Adrien Brody, WITH ANGEL WINGS. Although the angel wings were like parrot wings, but he really was an angel, from heaven and the whole shebang. He was in love with me, HOWEVER, he said although he would really LOVE to do me, he wasn't sure if it was cool with God. Because, you know, he's an angel and everything.

The other dream involved me going on some weirdo version of the Haunted Mansion Holiday, but all the animatronics (and also these stuffed animals I was clutching) were real. I was with my sister, trying to convince her of that, and she just laughed at me and called me stupid. I said, "No, there ARE real, they're alive and everything" and she still laughed. I then tried to leap over a giant pumpkin, but my sister grabbed onto my legs and it was really, really painful. I tried to punch her off me but I passed out from pain. When I woke up we were surrounded by all the living characters from Nightmare Before Christmas, including characters from Hocus Pocus, all concerned for my health. My sister apologized and the characters were all reciting lyrics from "Kidnap the Sandy Claws" and I thought to myself, "Santa Claus would shit if he saw all this"

Monday, January 09, 2006

Wouldn't it be interesting if we all just said exactly what was on our minds when it came to interacting with others? Exactly what you're thinking. No bullshit. Just let it all out. And, for convesation's sake, let's pretend that in everyday society, that's how people function. By saying shit that needs to be said.

I guess covering the truth or just flat-out making shit up is just how we work. Everyone is afraid of hurting everyone else, and on top of that everyone is afraid of making an idiot out of themselves. I suppose it all just gets to a certain point where, when almost everyone you know has been bullshitting about everything right to your face and you know it and it has been going on for months, you just get sick, tired, and pissed off. Or just frustrated.

Someone get me out of my house, I'm thinking too much.

Snickers are only good if you eat them.